Spring Break

As I woke up this morning, I was immediately deep in thought about a lot of things. It is the first day of spring break for us. Most people started celebrating on Friday but we focused on the celebration of Easter and what it really meant. Easter Sunday is the biggest day in the church, so our kids were not allowed to leave town until after church and lunch with the family. Priorities!

Harrison left after lunch to go to opening day for the Atlanta Braves and I took Morgan to the airport last night to fly to the beach with a girlfriend. She has never flown by herself so I tried my best not to be the worrying mother on the whole ride there. I even drove the truck so she wouldn't be embarassed to ride in the momma van. I chose my guidance statements carefully. With each one, I was cut off with an "I know mom!" or an "I am not a kid, mom". Nobody knows this better than I do. This pre-clipping of the wings has hit me hard in the face. In about 4 months she will be heading to college.

After I let her out at the curb of the airport (because she could do it all by herself), I hit the gas pedal and allowed the truck to do its redneck version of a take off. I did my best not to look in the rearview mirror to see if she was able to lift the suitcase or if she knew where to go. I looked in a different rearview mirror. I looked back to my teenage years. I looked back with a little regret and a longing to go back there and to do it over again....right.

I wish I had been half as focused and grounded as Morgan is. I wish I had been confident of what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wish I had pushed as hard for great grades. I wish I had been in love with Jesus and serving him like she is. Then I started wishing my bathroom vanity was lined with sunscreen and acne wash instead of pill bottles and sports cream. I would have traded my decision on which bill to pay for the decision on which bikini to wear. I almost felt regret set in so I quickly turned the radio station to some 80's music in excitement of knowing every word of a song for a change. Of course, I had to turn the volume up. Not because I was being cool, but so I could hear it.

I want to stop time. I want it to at least slow down. I have lots more memories to make and lots of kingdom work that is left to be done. My mind quickly went to the verse in Philippians 3:12-14 "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

I can't go backwards and make all my wrongs right, so I must focus forward on what is yet to come. There is no need to look back with regret when there is so much opportunity ahead. I must push my selfishness aside to make sure I make the most of each day. I just pray my body and mind can keep up with what my heart longs to do.