Braces and Quiet Places

I am officially six weeks into having my new braces. I am still not used to them. I am really trying to correct my attitude so that I remember to be grateful for the advancements in orthodontics and that the expense wasn't based on my age. The driving motivation really comes on the days when I can see that some of my teeth have already moved. Now, eating and cleaning are a whole different story. I am a toothbrush-aholic and it has just gotten worse with braces. I know it will be worth it.

Ridley and I go away at the beginning of each year to pray and write. We pick a different place each year. Our retreat is a sweet time to be still, be quiet, and to reflect. It takes a while to be comfortable with the silence. Typically we are both returning calls in the car on the way there. The world has become so noisy and the demands distract us. It's funny how even if my world gets quiet for a moment, my thoughts are making a ruckus.

Our few days away made me think about my braces and our quiet places. Our times away are awkward at first, but necessary. They aren't what I am used to in a normal day. I mean if there aren't the demands of 4 children, coupon clipping, laundry and a career, I don't know how to act. Just as my braces are correcting and realigning my teeth, my quiet getaways realign my thinking and correct my heart. Once I get used to the slower pace and the silence, I really like it. I can see and feel the benefits of it. Those moments challenge me to find that kind of quiet back in the real world. Psalm 46:10 says "Be still and know that I am God". Let's face it. Most days we run around knowing He is God, but do we really stop to be still and KNOW Him?

On this particular getaway, one area of focus was on finishing the book we are writing. That requires some travelling back in time, which is not always comfortable. Prayer, getting in the Word, and reading over my past journal entries, was an incredible time. It was a refresher course of tracing His hand through my life. I was able to recognize how God has answered some prayers and some that I am glad He didn't (the way I wanted). I found areas in my heart that haven't completely healed. I saw the joy in six times the laundry and how God has blessed me. I even read in my journal about the warfare we faced last year when we came home from our retreat. That was so cool to see how I needed to be praying for my family this year.

"He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray." Proverbs 10:17

Brace yourself! It will be worth it.

Baseball tips for life

Ridley recently coached our son's baseball team and I learned a lot. I enhanced my baseball skills by being married to the coach. I learned to keep the stats while using the "clicker" to keep up with the pitch count. I even learned to rake the field and use the chalk machine. I knew the rules and some of the lingo so I was excited to test my ESPN skills as a team mom. Watching my husband's love for baseball and encouraging young men, was a super cute bonus.

I must be honest. It can be really hard to stay feminine and Christ like when in the heat of baseball. I found myself wanting to yell at the umpire or wanting to jerk a knot in someone else's kid who had an attitude. There was even a time or two I heard my own voice (much deeper) coaching the boys from the bleachers. It was easy to fall into the moment and forget to keep my stats or pitch counts.

That's a lot like life. My spiritual vision can get clouded. This week had a rough start for me and my spiritual vision was no where close to 20/20. With selfishness, false expectations and fear, my vision got a little fuzzy. Funny how, when that happens, things seem much worse than they really are. Bring on the overwhelming feelings of life!

Matthew 6:22 and 23 says "The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness." Interesting that the eye has that kind of power. Not the ears, not the tongue and not even the heart. Today is still today and tomorrow will still be tomorrow, but being full of light means seeing life at its best - abundantly! The responsibility is on me and how I look at things. I sure wish that was easier to do sometimes. I have learned that it takes training and I don't need to beat myself up each time I lose focus. I need to accept that I may not be who I want to be in Christ yet, but that I am no where close to who I used to be. I just need to get back up to bat and keep learning. Praise God that His mercies are new each morning! As I get my focus back on Him and listen for my instructions, I pray He will respond with "Good eye, Lisa.....Good eye".

Invest in Memories

At 42 years old, I have the most incredible memories of my dad around Valentine's Day. Honestly, with every holiday, I think about my dad and I can't help but smile. I have watched him over the years as he gives. He is an amazing gift giver throughout the whole year! The sweetest part is, it is not the expense he has put into it, but the thought.

As Valentine's Day rolled around this year, my daughter Landon, who is 10 years old, put in her gift request. Bracing myself for the wish list of normal kids nowadays, I was picturing a laptop or an iphone. I was pleasantly surprised when she said, "I want one of those red hearts with candy like Pops used to give you." I asked her for more details, surprised that she knew about my candy memories. She elaborated, "You know. The ones with the chocolate that you used to smush your fingers into to see what you were getting before you ate it." Obviously, I had bragged on my dad a time or two. The really cute part is that Landon is allergic to all nuts and assorted candy is not her friend. She wasn't thinking about the fact that carrying on my "finger smushing" tradition could cause her fingers to swell like balloons.

So, Ridley and I stopped by the candy aisle at the grocery last week in search of a heart full of assorted, nut free chocolate. That is hard to find but we were successful. We picked up something for all the kids. Even I am in favor of high fructose corn syrup once in a while (for a good memory making moment).

My Dad has always put time and thought into his gifts. You better be careful what you mention around my dad. He will hunt it down and seek it out just to bless you. Ask my mom how she felt when she opened her box of rose petals and a parade route map for the Rose Bowl parade trip she had always dreamed of. Ask my brother who has been the recipient of gifts where my dad stood in line for hours just to get an autograph. Ask this daughter who grew up loving football. My dad drove me to Atlanta before a Super Bowl just to see my favorite team (at the time the Buffalo Bills) in the lobby of their hotel. We didn't even have tickets. We drove back home in time for the game on t.v. Then on my 28th birthday, he took me to Buffalo so I could cheer for my team on home turf. He even agreed to walk to the tailgating parking lot to knock on Jim Kelly's RV. I had watched enough pre-game shows to recognize the quarterback's family RV when I saw it.

Whether it is taking roses to the bank tellers, pizza to a business that gives good service, dollar bills in toilet paper, or chocolate eclairs on your desk, you smile because you know Pops has been around. That's his gift. So as I sat down with Landon for her first smushing of the candy, I looked at that heart and realized how much God must love my dad. For 2 Corinthians 9:7 says "Each man should give what he has decided to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver." You don't have to smush my dad to see what you are really getting. What is on the inside is obvious from the outside.

To All the Single Ladies...(and Men)

Now before you think this blog post isn't for you, think again. Even if you are not single, I am sure there are single people you know who could use your prayers. I am referring to all the singles. I have friends that are single and waiting for just the right person. I have friends that are single again, whether they wanted to be or not. Then there are single friends who have lost their spouses. None of these situations are easy. It sure isn't easy on Valentine's weekend. I remember!

When I was a single mom, I dreaded the whole month of February. All the fuss of flowers, candy, sweet cards, ooey gooey romantic moments and those "every kiss begins with Kay" commercials. I remember my first single (again) Valentine's holiday. I found myself in Toys R Us in between my work appointments, trying to find something for my youngest daughter that wasn't sugar. There she was! Barbie--all packaged with her Ken--and hearts everywhere. She had this big smile on her face. The glare I was giving that plastic girl must have prompted the Toys R Us employee to ask, "Can I help you?" "Yes", I replied. "Where is the hard working, single mom Barbie?" The employee in his little red vest then asked, "Did you see that in our flyer?"

So this week, as I have prayed for my single friends, I have prayed they not one of you would settle. Here is the verse you need to cling to. Isaiah 43:18 and 19
"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a NEW thing."
It says He is DOING a new thing. You are right in the middle of a cool God plan. Don't you dare give up or settle for anything less than God's best.

This week, three years ago, I had my first date with Ridley. Yes, it ended up being in the month that I had dreaded for several years. It was an extremely cold night as he was driving me to my house. After freezing on my doorstep, Ridley asked if he could come in. I literally let him in 2 steps inside my door. Our first date had been great, but I was setting my boundaries. Every kiss may begin with Kay but it wasn't going to begin with Lisa. Then, my heart popped out. Ridley asked, "Do you mind if I pray with you before I go?" I immediately fell into his arms and put my head on his shoulder as I began to cry. In that moment, I got the sweetest Valetine gift from Jesus. For a few minutes, I did not have to be the strong leader in my house.

My friends, take heart! God is doing a new thing and you will not have to settle. He has His eye on you and loves you. He is singling you out for something great!

Just Laugh

I absolutely LOVE to laugh! If you know me at all, you know I love "punnies". Those are made up words or phrases created to remind me to laugh. I have to be a little more careful being married to Ridley. I will never forget the gasp I let out in church one Sunday when he was preaching and said "hairy butt satan". That is the nickname this satan-hatin' wife uses to fuss at the enemy.

We can love Jesus and laugh. It's ok. It's in the Bible. I mean look at Abraham in Genesis 17:17 "Abraham fell facedown; he laughed and said to himself, "Will a son be born to a man a hundred years old?" Of course, if you were in the middle of an in depth study, you would pick up on the fact that his doubt was evidence of some unbelief. However, take a minute and think about how Abraham was feeling and then think about God's response. He had to chuckle.

We do it as parents. I remember a time when I was so frustrated with my daughter that I hid in my closet. She recruited her sister to help find me. I could hear them calling my name throughout the house as their voices got louder and louder. I think they began to panic at one point and I found myself chuckling in the dark. Bad mother.

There are those moments where life is so serious and so heavy that you just long for a laugh. There are many times I call Ridley at work and tell him to come home and make me laugh. He knows that means the day has been tough or I have had too much big girl stuff. He has even gotten pretty good at making his own punnies. I love that he makes me laugh. I am still laughing at something he said 4 nights ago. I was quietly praying outloud in the dark of the night, thinking he was asleep. He softly asked, "Are you talking to that other man in your life again?". Jesus and I were in time out at that moment because Ridley likes his sleep, but I love that he chose to make me laugh.

Then, there are those moments where the pain is so deep you forget how to laugh. If you have heard me speak, I have shared about a day I was using all the physical and mental energy I had to drive home from a long day at the office. I was in the middle of my divorce at the time. My cell phone rang and I saw the familiar number of my friend. When I answered, she immediately said, "I have a verse for you." Relief came in a rush and I pulled my car over to the side of the road. I grabbed a pen and a file folder in my seat as I desperately got ready for what she was about to share. I said, "I'm ready!" She said, "It is Proverbs 11:22". She continued, "An adulterous woman is like a gold ring in a pig's snout". There was silence. I guess I was waiting for the big WOW moment. I was the victim of an adulterous woman but I wasn't sure about the whole gold ring/pig thing. Then in a louder than normal voice for my friend, she finished with "I bet it has a booger on it". She immediately began laughing and snorting on the phone while she commanded me to go home and write booger in my Bible. I have never fogotten that moment. In that season, amazing verses were shared that were really great words of healing, but that day I felt hope in laughing again. To this day, "booger" is written in my Bible.

Several pages over from Proverbs 11 in Proverbs 14:13 it says "Even in laughter the heart may ache". If your heart is aching today, pick up the phone or your Bible and put in a request for a good laugh.

Order

As I have previously shared, you know I only do Starbucks two or three times a year. It's mainly because I am not a big coffee drinker but I also get a little worked up about the whole ordering process. I can't ever remember if it is a "tall, non-fat, decaf, vanilla latte" or if it is a "decaf, tall, vanilla, non-fat latte". What I love even more is that the person taking my order is trained to repeat what I am requesting in the proper order. Do they really need to point out that I got the sequence of adjectives wrong? It cracks me up because I end up too embarassed to remember exactly what the correct order was for my next visit.

Jump from coffee to life. How many times do I get the order wrong? How many times do we as Christ followers fall into the same routine as the world? We are to be different. Not different like better than everyone else, but different to the point that others notice and want to live a life of proper order. We can't just proclaim it. We must live it. That means a pile of my dirty clothes shouldn't come before my quiet time. It means praying before worrying. It means reading the Bible or praying before picking up the phone to gossip with a friend. It means integrity before prosperity. It means tithing before paying the bills. It means marriage before sex.

One of the greatest tragedies I see in my ministry is the order in marriages. I believe marriages are falling apart because so many are getting the order backwards. I believe circumstances we often face, start to cause the order in our marriages to shift.

Wives, God is first and then your husband and then your kids. The very best thing you can give your kids is the example of loving your husband the way the Bible tells us to. I am shocked at single moms who put a man before their kids when dating, and then put the kids before their husband after marriage. Husbands, God first and then your wife. Not your job. Not your kids. Not your sports or cars. Our kids need more Godly men setting the example so sons can be great husbands and so daughters don't settle for anything less.

"So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. BUT seek FIRST His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matthew 6:31-33)

It comes down to what you and I are surrounding ourselves with. To be in this world and to be effective, we have to spend more time putting truth into our heads and hearts so that truth is what we live out. God's law is our guide. Romans 3:20 says "Therefore, no one will be declared righteous in His sight by observing the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of sin."

Branching out

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I got a call a couple of days ago that was unexpected but a blessing. My mother-in- law called in the middle of the day and actually caught me working from home. I have to admit I was a little worried that she was calling to tell me that our Aunt Doris, who has been ill, had pasted away. I was suprised when she started asking me questions about my family. I thought to myself, it was a little too late to be doing background checks since Ridley and I have been married about two and a half years. Then I thought maybe she was testing my memory when she started asking about middle names of my great grandparents. She stopped and explained that she was doing research for a family member who is working on the family tree.

I was blown away at the thought of being on their family tree. My new extended family has embraced me and loved me in amazing ways. Tears gently flowed down my cheek as I remembered a verse in my Bible. It was on the left page, somewhere in the New Testament and I knew my blue ink had scribbled "Japan Home Church- June 2006". I can't always remember where certain scripture is located but I love to write in my Bible! I immediately recalled a Sunday service I was a part of in Japan while on a mission trip with my daughter, Morgan. After our phone conversation, I immediatley searched and found what I was looking for.

The verse is in John 15 where Jesus is explaining the analogy of the vine and the branches. Verse 2 says "He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful".
While in Japan, I remember comparing this pruning to my past marriage. I knew that my marriage had not been bearing fruit the way God intended and I remember thinking about how my family tree at that time had stubs for branches. I felt like the Charlie Brown Christmas tree in that moment. There were extended family relationships that had grown over all those years and they were suddenly cut out of my life as well.

Although I do not have a green thumb, I know that branches are cut back to promote growth. God must do that sometimes in our life to strengthen our character and our faith. It may not look pretty for a while but the end result ends up being beautiful.
I firmly believe that can only happen when we allow Him to do the pruning. We can not get to clipping on our own or the timing might not be right. That is why in John 15 it states in verse 1 "my Father is the gardener".

My sweet mother-in-law apologized at the end of her call for not knowing certain information about me. Little did she realize that her call had me once again humbly overwhelmed at God's goodness. Looking back, little did I know that day in June of 2006, that almost a year later, I would have new growth that would turn out this beautiful.