Put Your Man In His Place

I am blessed to have the opportunity to hear other women's stories, to encourage them and to pray with them. I absolutely love being able to pray for women and to help them rely on Jesus in some of the most difficult times. I thoroughly enjoy celebrating the victories with them. I specifically remember in my own story that moment when everything was gone and I questioned prayer, everything I had been taught and whether Jesus really cared. I had prayed my heart out and things hadn't ended up the way I wanted. I could have given up on Him and turned the other way. It didn't take me long to finally write in my journal, "I have no other choice but to believe You." I was alone with two daughters and one big unknown world ahead. I decided I had nothing much left to lose and a responsibility to model Christ for my kids.

For days, months and years, I would pray some long prayers and some really short ones. Some that were simply, "Dear Jesus, I don't want to do this." Other days I would journal and as time went on, my handwriting became less sloppy. Looking back I can almost trace the peace. There were high moments and really low moments. Most of the time they had no rhyme or reason. There weren't special occasions that equated the high moments and there wasn't always a terrible event that triggered the bad days. Trying to let Jesus back into all the broken pieces of my heart was like major surgery. There was a recovery period for sure.

Then came the strength and even more peace. Soon I heard myself laughing and I enjoyed simple things for the first time all over again. My self confidence was building. I could feel friends and family watching with anticipated excitement as if I were a baby taking her first steps. They wanted to make sure I wasn't going to wobble and fall down again. On the days I would fall, I always had a friend there to help me up or to speak some really tough love (aka get your butt in gear).

Then came the day I finally accepted that I might be by myself for the rest of my life as a single parent. Saying I am okay with that and really meaning it are two different things. It was only a couple of months later that I met Ridley. I firmly believe that God held back the blessing until I fully grasped the order. He (God) had to be first in everything in my life. When Ridley and I began dating, I was reading my Bible and journaling more than ever. I loved the gift of a Godly man that He had given me, but I never want Jesus to stop being my first boyfriend. Once I let Him in that spot in my life, I never wanted to replace Him.

So many times I hear from ladies when things are going really bad. I trust that the Lord brings women into my life that I can love on and return the favor. I hear the good and the bad, understanding both and knowing specifically how I can pray for them without even having to ask sometimes. I celebrate the victory with some women as they make it through the difficult stuff and can breathe again. Then comes the peace and then comes a MAN. Suddenly, I don't hear from them any more. I no longer know their prayer needs and I no longer get to celebrate the victories of a relationship going the way God would want it to. I pray anyway hoping the order hasn't gotten out of whack. Some of the women will keep me posted. They will tell me they have met the right guy and ask me to pray. They will tell me they left a relationship that was leaning towards compromise. They will share their struggles and ask for advice on how to keep Jesus number one.

Here is my suggestion that will fit any season for all of us. Whether praying for a guy to come along, or dating or even being married, you better put your man in his place. Don't ever let a guy have the spot that God and only God intended to have in the first place. "But seek FIRST his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Matthew 6:33