After Three Years

Today is our three year anniversary. Many call it a wedding anniversary but we call it a family anniversary. A bunch has taken place in three years....A Barron Bunch! Lots of laughs. Lots of healing. Lots of tears. Lots of hard stuff. Lots of sweet stuff. Lots of love and lots of Jesus.

Being a wife and mother is hard work. It is a good thing that love covers a multitude of sins (1Peter 4:8). My husband and my kids have been patient (most of the time - ha ha) while I adjust to being Lisa Barron. The third role that came with Mrs. Barron, was being a pastor's wife. I can tell you some days I forget I am the pastor's wife and some days I over think it and under pray it.

When Ridley asked me to marry him, I remember sitting up late one night in front of the glow of my laptop. I searched "pastor wives". As the internet examples flashed before me, my stomach dropped. The many pictures of pastor wives scared me. Big beehive hairstyles, oversized glasses, no makeup and dresses that looked like women were to be choked to death with the role. Where were the cool chicks? Where were jeans and cute shoes? Most of the websites included background pictures of angels and flowers. Where were the dirty clothes and coupons that didn't get filed before they expired?

When we were dating and I later attended Ridgeview, I sat in the back. The back was my safe spot. I knew there was a future with Ridley at that point. You see, I wasn't going to change churches until there was. With that future, I knew I would be moving to the front row. I was having to warm up to the spot and it wasn't because I was shy. It was because I still wasn't completely sold on the fact that God could use me in that capacity. Dating the pastor is no easy deal. Dating the pastor with two divorces under your belt is down right tough. I often found myself asking Jesus, "Are you sure?"

The first Sunday as Mrs. Barron, I was upfront in my dreaded spot. I had a hard time concentrating. My distraction went like this: "Do I raise my hands because Lisa would raise her hands right about now? Wait! What if they think I am raising my hands because I am on the front row? It's not about you Lisa. Don't raise your hands and take away from what the Holy Spirit is trying to do. Get it together, Lisa. You said you weren't going to let this change you. Raise your hands." I have tried very hard to NOT let it change who I am. I did buy a pastor's wife book once. I never read it. I decided to just stick to the Bible as pictures of those internet pastor wives crossed my mind.

A couple Sundays later, Ridley shared some parts of our story in his message. After the service, a lady approached me in tears. She told me she had been a stripper in the past. Her next statement blew me away. She told me she had hope in God because if He loved me enough to give me Ridley after I had been divorced, then God could love her too with her mistakes. That statement changed me as a pastor's wife.

Being a pastor's wife can be incredible and it can be lonely. Satan can often attack the heart of the pastor's wife in an effort to get at the pastor. Trust me! The hardest part is being able to be still and know He is God when people attack your husband. I see his heart. I hear Ridley's prayers. I know he takes his role as pastor seriously. Therefore, the "don't mess with my man" syndrome wants to take over.

The demon in me often tries to come out on Sunday mornings. Note to self early on was to not bring up big stuff while heading to church. I have learned to pray in advance for our Sunday mornings. Ridley is my first ministry. I have my eye on him every Sunday to see what his needs might be, to watch and see how I can pray for him, to encourage him, to smile at him, and to tell him I believe in him. I have made tons of mistakes in my first three years at Ridgeview, but I am surrounded by incredible people and a staff that has been patient with me. they have loved me through every minute of it. They pray for me and they don't judge me. I love my church. I couldn't have picked a better starting place as Mrs. Barron. I am still on the front row, raising my hands and wearing my "I Love My Pastor" t-shirt every now and then with jeans and cute shoes.

Thank you God for trusting me enough to be Mrs. Barron.