My Name

It is so exciting to get a gift that is monogrammed. I remember when I got married the first time, I got luggage that had my new initials on them. I also got a set of drinking glasses with my new last name initial. Then came the divorce and those items became reminders. So when I got married again, I was given a really nice robe with my new initials. Out with the old and in with the new. Then came another divorce. I was suddenly not a big fan of monogrammed items. I felt like the 80's artist, Prince. I was going to go on a first name basis only.

After my second divorce, I struggled with who I was and what name I should use. I thought about going back to my original name to honor my parents. Then I thought about my girls and how at that moment, three of us living together would all have different last names. That was a profound moment for me. I was faced with my failures every time I filled out a form for school or a doctor's office. As secretaries and office managers looked at the form and then looked at me, I wanted to immediately reply, "I'm the mother".

Shortly after my second divorce the girls and I moved. The house I chose had this great sunroom overlooking a pool. We called it our Son-room as we all three designated it our special place for quiet times. It was in that room that I was reminded we are daughters of the King. As my girlfriend, Terra always says, we are royalty. Peace and security came over to visit that day in my Sonroom. I invited them to stay.

Since that day, I have met and married the most amazing man. He has given me the incredible opportunity to visit another letter in the alphabet. He has given me a whole lot more than that, but I proudly write Barron every chance I get. I did a really great job of marketing myself in real estate with my old name, so it has been a hard transition for some people. There are still slip ups here and there, but it doesn't bother me. After we got married, I even had a hard time remembering. There was a day that I recall trying to figure out what to take to a church event when A through M was supposed to bring something salty and N through Z was something sweet. Ridley must have seen me thinking because he said "Baby, you are a B and that isn't going to change."

There are days I still try to grasp who I am. Now as a pastor's wife, a mother of four, a working girl, a friend, a daughter, a stranger and more, I can rest with my friends, peace and security knowing that first and foremost, I am a daughter of this incredible King. He has probably had to use some white out in The Lambs Book of Life, but as my last name has changed, His love hasn't.

On days when I still face reminders and struggles of my past, I do whatever it takes to battle the lies and claim the truths. One way I do that is to listen to Travis Cottrell. That man can sing and his voice just makes the devil run! His song "You Changed My Name", is my favorite running song and it gets my day off to a great start. I absolutely LOVE this song!! Add it to your playlist and sing it as loud as you can, proclaiming that you have the coolest name when you belong to Jesus. Here are a few of the lyrics:

"Who I was before, doesn't matter anymore. You changed my name. You called me Forgiven. You changed my name. You called me Redeemed. You took my shame and wrote a new beginning to the story I was living and I will never be the same. You saw what I could be and reaching out for me.....You changed my name!"

Thank you Travis for this song and thank you Jesus for a name that I can be proud of!