Tough Questions - Real Answers #7 - My Daddy

After thinking over the last six posts, I have thought a lot about relationships in general. Through my divorce I saw how my parents and brother were affected. Events happen in our life and they have a ripple effect on the people in our lives. The first extended family member I wanted to interview was my dad. My family has always been close and over the years my heart has been broken for the heartache I have put my parents through. It must be hard to watch an adult child and to know when to be silent and when to speak up. My daddy has a heart of gold but can be a man of a few words when talking about tough stuff. That is why I am so grateful and proud of his willingness to share his answers.

Question: You were the first person I called the minute I found out about the affair. What do you remember about that day?

Dad's Answer: I remember you called hysterical. I came and got the girls and brought them to Mom. I came back and lifted you up off the floor and stayed with you until you calmed down. (Most of the afternoon). It really wasn't a shock to me because of the way he had acted over the years.

Question: How hard is it to watch your adult child when they are in a bad environment or when they make bad choices?

Dad's Answer: You love your children and don't want them to get hurt. You always want the best for them and you want them to be happy.

Question: What did you learn through my divorce?

Dad's Answer: I didn't learn a lot. I already knew divorce was hard on kids but I was relieved you were getting out of a mentally abusive situation.

Question: What was the hardest part?

Dad's Answer: Watching you go through all the anguish and trying to take care of all my girls. Watching all he did over the years and not being able to change it, broke my heart.

Question: Were you ever mad at me for staying in the marriage and attempting to work it out?

Dad's Answer: NO!!!! I wasn't mad at you. I was mad at him for all the years of him never saying he was sorry and for all the lies.

Question: What did you think when I started dating Ridley?

Dad's Answer: WOW!!! Finally maybe something good in your life.

Question: How did my past affect your outlook on us getting married?

Dad's Answer: It didn't!! You were a lot smarter and I trusted your judgement. I knew Ridley was a Godly man.

Question: Has my past affected the way you deal with my new family?

Dad's Answer: No. Not at all.

Question: What is the hardest part for extended family during a divorce and then with blending a family?

Dad's Answer: During a divorce your family just loves on you and tries to see to your needs. Swirling a new family was not hard for me. It was probably harder for the kids to love new grandparents than for us to love them.

Question: Did you learn anything new about God through all my stuff?

Dad's Answer: I have learned more about God as I watch you and Ridley and how you are touching the world one life at a time. I am so proud of you and how you have handled your life. I am proud of the Barron Bunch too.